To Envy a Gryffindor
by dork-with-glasses
Summary: It wasn't a bad thing. To envy someone who was daring, brave and chivalrous. It wasn't a bad thing. Not really. But, however much you envy one, you're no Gryffidor. Not yet anyway.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

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To envy a Gryffindor.

It wasn't such a bad thing. Was it?

It wasn't something that someone should be ashamed of. Was it?

It wasn't a humiliating fact. Was it?

You're not so sure, are you?

To be daring, brave and chivalrous. It wasn't a bad thing to want. To envy.

And yet, somehow, it was.

Could you possibly explain to your mother and father that, somewhere deep down, you wanted to be like your blood traitor brother?

Could you confide in your friends that you just wanted to be as brave as the other students around you?

Could you tell your sisters that you, just like your cousin, didn't want to be a part of their family anymore if they continued with their prejudice ways?

Could you admit to your ex-best friend that you loved her, when you knew your chivalrous enemy held her heart?

Could you reveal to you family that you wanted to be like your friend to escape the prejudice, the prejudice that was their fault, surrounding you?

Of course you couldn't. Because, however much you envy one, you're no Gryffindor.

You've got your own opinions, your own values which make you a member of your house. Whether you are hardworking, just and loyal, or intelligent, wise and eager to learn, or maybe cunning, sly and ambitious; it all depends on who you are.

You're not daring, brave or chivalrous.

Not yet anyway.

That's why you envy them after all.

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Author's note: Well I hope you enjoyed the prologue. It's much shorter than the other chapters are going to be (I've written the first one so far and that's 2000 words, although it'll be the longest one I'm guessing) so bear with me on that one.

**Basically, I'm procrastinating writing my other stories as I've got writer's block for both of them and I thought of this idea while hanging out the washing today and thought it would be really fun to write. It's going to be seven chapters long, the prologue, five characters who envy Gryffindors in general or a specific Gryffindor at one point in their live and then an epilogue/sum up of sorts. I've already finished my first character and will upload that tomorrow and I've started my second, third and fourth (and will hopefully finish those soon). **

**All characters are based on one line from this prologue (the 'could you...' parts) and you can probably guess them (I tried on my sister and she got all in one guess except the second, which could probably apply to a lot of students, and the third). Oh and you'll know the first because of what characters I put the story under.**

**I'd really appreciate a review, anything you have to comment on really. Thanks so much.**

**TTFN**

**Dork-with-glasses**

**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**


	2. To Envy a Brother

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

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Regulus Black

You sit in your bedroom at Grimmauld Place, contemplating the Slytherin banners that line your walls. The opposite to the red and gold that line your brother's, slightly larger, room. The only thing he ever got over you, you reflect. Probably because you weren't born yet, you think haughtily, and Sirius hadn't quite managed to rebel yet. Well, not as much, Sirius was always a rebellious child. But never more so than now.

Even in your room on the top floor, you can still hear the yells echoing down in the kitchen. At fourteen though, you've managed to block out most of the noise, through practice. Your mother and brother have had these rows often enough now that you're not surprised in the slightest. It's just a habit they haven't broken.

Maybe you can see where Sirius is coming from. But there have always been the pureblood ways that your parents tried to teach Sirius and you swallowed up like oxygen. Maybe you can understand what Sirius means but you've always been an obedient child, you listen to what your parents tell you. And, you think to yourself, they haven't been wrong yet. It's much easier, much _safer_, to go along with your mother and father, and Cissy, and Bella and the rest of the Blacks. The rebellious path Sirius chose seems so much harder than the road you've dutifully taken.

And that's what you admire about your brother.

Even when you were kids, he never took the easy way out. You remember when he was 12, you were 10, and a little muggle girl was lost. She must have been about eight and she gone out to play but couldn't remember which house was her aunt's. Sirius went with her and knocked on every door down our street in search for her family. Making her laugh and smile, even though she had no idea where she was and should have been very scared. He could have just told her to keep trying by herself, but he didn't. He took the long road, just for the sake of someone else's happiness.

It was chivalrous and brave and from that day forth you had no doubt that your brother belonged in Gryffindor. You sort of wish you were the same.

It hurt, that fact that he was a Gryffindor, especially a few months later when you walked up to the sorting hat and it sorted you into Slytherin. But as you've explained, you always were docile. And you've never done a brave thing in your life, and it makes you loathe yourself that you know it. Wouldn't it be easier to live in ignorant bliss? But you know the truth. You know you're a coward, a brain-washed coward. You're only fourteen but you can't back out now. You've been your parent's well-trained pet from the start, and it's hard to change what's been a fact for fourteen years.

A bang brings you back to reality. A door slamming in the room along the landing. It's not unusual in the holidays for that to happen, with both your mother and brother home, but there's something about the slam that makes you creep to your door. Your brother's door ricocheting off the wall makes you wonder how bad the fight really is.

You peep your head around the doorframe of your room to see Sirius's door wide open, still vibrating slightly from the force of the slam, with a bunch of swearing and various curses coming from your brother's room (you never knew he could be so creative with his curse words). Inching out of your room, you stand in the entrance to his.

Sirius is moving fast, pulling things down from shelves and throwing them into the open trunk at the foot of his bed.

"Are you going somewhere?" You ask him. It's not like the two of you hate each other. You don't get on well, mostly to do with the houses you were sorted into and the ways you interpreted your parents' lessons, but you're brothers. Nothing can change that. And even brothers who aren't on the same wave length want to know what's going on when the other is throwing things angrily into a trunk.

"I'm out of here, Reg, I'm not staying." He said with his back to you as he continued hurling things into his bags.

"Why?" It's not a plea for him to stay. You know enough about your brother to know that once he's made up his mind about something, there's no one that can stop him (with the possible exception of James Potter) and you're not sure you want to stop him anyway. You just want to know why this is the right time to leave. You're not going to lie; you've seen this coming for awhile. But maybe he's shocked you because he's actually going through with it. Maybe you thought he'd never have guts. You shouldn't have doubted. You made your decision on your bravery, your non-existent bravery which is completely different to Sirius's Gryffindor courage.

"Because I don't belong here, and I don't think I ever did. And I'm bloody sick of all your bloody pureblood supremacy rubbish." You wince as he very obviously included you in that 'your'. "You're all pathetic and I hate it all. I hate this family, this god damned house and everything to do with the Blacks. So I'm out. I've had enough, I'm leaving."

You just stand in the doorway, watching him pack the last of his belongings. Once he finishes he turns around and sees you still standing there.

"I'm sorry, Reg, for not being like you. For not gulping down all their bull but I can't help that. I just wasn't meant for this family." He says to you, his trunk standing next to him, a bag slung over his back, ironically black hair falling over his face.

You just nod in response. There's nothing to say. You've got nothing to say to him.

"Maybe you'll see that too some day. I sure hope so but I'm not sure. It's never too late you know. I'm sorry." He says finally and with that he walks past your small figure and into the hallway, down the stairs and out the front door.

You don't turn around from where you stand, in the doorway of Sirius's room, but you hear the front door slam. You head back to your own room, hearing your mother yell from several floors below. The words 'good riddance' catch your ears.

But you disagree.

With Sirius there, it almost seemed like that maybe, if you had the guts one day, you could change. Now, with him gone, you're not so sure. Your path was picked out long ago, just as his was. Maybe by fate, destiny or karma. Or maybe by a six year old boy who refused to go to cousin Bella's birthday, and a four year old that went quietly without a word.

You can't but help feel envious. Wish that his path was yours. If you had had the courage to do as he did, maybe everything would work out differently. Better. But maybe not. Whichever it is, you never did, don't and never will have the courage to do so.

And with Sirius gone, you're envious.

To be a Gryffindor and have the bravery to walk out on your family. To stand up to their bloody pureblood beliefs. You've always agreed with them, but you're not so sure now. Not so confident.

Maybe it's the idolising older brother stage you went through when you were about six coming back to haunt you. But maybe it's the way that you think you know, deep down, somewhere in your gut, that Sirius knows exactly what he's doing.

You're envious.

You envy your Gryffindor brother.

Wishing you had the courage to do what he did. To even have the bravery to doubt.

But you don't.

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_To the Dark Lord_

_I know I will be dead long before you read this but I want you to know that it was I who discovered your secret. I have stolen the real Horcrux and intend to destroy it as soon as I can. _

_I face death in the hope that when you meet your match, you will be mortal once more._

_R.A.B_

Your hand shakes as you put your quill back in your ink pot. You can't quite believe yourself what you are about to do. But you know you have to. You're the only one who knows about the Dark Lord and his Horcrux, you're the only one who can get rid of it and make the Dark Lord mortal again.

You could tell Dumbledore, or some other Order of the Phoenix member, but who would trust you? Known Death Eater and Sirius Black's evil younger brother? No one, that's for sure. You'd be dead long before you could even open your mouth, or hold up the white flag.

No. This is something you must do alone. It's the end of you, but hopefully the dark lord too.

You walk over to Kreacher's cupboard, knock on the door and ask him to take you to the cave. You grab his small wrist, it was shaking but you didn't give it much thought, too nervous about what you are about to do, and with a _crack_ the two of you disapparate. You cut your arm with a knife that you kept in your pocket, rubbed some blood against the wall, just as Kreacher had said the Dark Lord had done to him. Walking across the floor of the dark cave, Kreacher shows you where the boat is and you manage to heave it up. Once there, the two of you set off, in silence, for the middle of the lake.

You can feel something, no some thin_gs_ moving beneath you but you try not to look. You don't want to know what's beneath the surface, what you'll end up meeting, you know for certain you won't make it out of here alive.

If you did, the Dark Lord would know, he'd go after your parents, your cousins. You couldn't have that, now could you? With the small vestiges of courage you possess, you take a deep breath and step out of the boat.

The potion is green in colour. How fitting, you think to yourself. A sickly green, just like the Slytherin colours you obediently wore at school. The colours of the house you wanted to be a part of, and didn't want to belong to at the same time. Before you turned fifteen, there was always a glimmer of hope that maybe you'd change. After Sirius left, everything went spiralling downwards. The mark on your left arm is proof of that, you think sadly as you unconsciously rub it.

You don't know why, but you seemed to swallow up the beliefs even more than before. It was so easy, to make your family happy; to show them that they could have a son they could be proud of (unfortunately for you, the one they should be proud of certainly wasn't you). Somewhere along the lines, you started truly believing in the pureblood supremacy yourself. You were brainwashed. Naive and stupid. You should have seen what was coming happen. Your mind wasn't clear until the day that Kreacher returned from his mission with the Dark Lord.

It was then that everything fell into place.

All the lies, the views, the values your family had brought you up on had come tumbling down. The belief that what you were doing was right, that following the Dark Lord was right, crumbled into nothingness. You couldn't have been more disgusted with yourself. More envious of your brother, who managed to escape it all.

Well here, tonight, in this cave, maybe you'd make a difference.

You tell Kreacher to make sure you keep drinking until the potion is finished, to make sure that he switches the real locket with the fake (your note enclosed in it) and to get himself out of here, alone. You order him never to tell your mother, or anyone else what had happened and to make sure, more than anything, that he destroys the real locket. He's shaking now, begging you not to do it, that he'll do it instead but, for once in your life, you ignore him.

You start to feel insane from the moment the potion touches your lips which are dry with nerves. Memories echoing around your head. All the ashamed thoughts, broken promises, innocent people tortured flow through your insane head. Screams, yells and cries of pain. It makes you cry, you call out to anyone to help you, your mother, father, _Sirius_, anyone to save you from you memories. The ones you never allowed yourself to think of. More yells and screams and you want to die. Kill me. You think, Kreacher, just kill me, please.

Water. You need water. The potion burnt up your throat, dancing on it, making you want to die with the pain of it. Water. You need it _now. _

You crawl to the surface of the lake; the mucky water looks appetising, even in this state. The moment the cool liquid touches you, you know you're dead. Soon will be anyway.

Your last conscience thoughts as the Inferi pull you down to the bottom of the lake and the water fills your aching lungs and you want to die sooner in pain, they're about daring nerve and chivalry that set Gryffindors apart.

You don't want to sound arrogant, but you probably do, it's in your nature after all, but maybe, you think, just maybe you've done what your brother did.

Not exactly the same, but still. You stood up to their pureblood beliefs; you never belonged, not really. You just acted like you did.

Maybe you were more like your blood traitor brother than you thought.

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Author's note: Now this will be the longest chapter (I've just got so much to say about Regulus but not as much for the other four) and I hope you enjoyed it. I'm a bit worried about the end part. I, obviously, have never drowned to death so I don't know what that would feel like so I'm sorry if that sounds unrealistic. Well I hope you enjoyed it anyway.

**The next chapter will probably take a little longer to come out as I haven't finished it yet. But hopefully in the next couple of days. **

**Thanks for all the reviews. I really appreciate them, they mean so much. So thanks!**

**TTFN**

**Dork-with-glasses**

**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**


	3. To Envy a Classmate

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

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Ernie Macmillan

It wasn't that you weren't proud of who you were, you were Ernie Macmillan, Hufflepuff prefect, member of Dumbledore's army and high achieving student, you had great friends and enjoyed life (well before this year anyway), you were proud to be you. However if there was one thing you'd change about yourself, it would be that just weren't brave enough.

You're a Hufflepuff, not a Gryffindor. You got scared easily when dangerous events took place, and didn't always keep a cool head in a stressful situation. You were no Neville Longbottom; you didn't stand up to the Carrows openly like he did. You didn't get a smart mouth, say all those things that made everyone else feel better, feel like fighting. You followed along. You fought, you're a man who stands up for what he believes in after all, and you fought hard, you just didn't have the bravery of Neville and the rest of the Gryffindors.

You were brave enough to follow, not brave enough to lead. Hufflepuff bravery, you think to yourself. The bravery to do what's right, but not to advertise it. You know that you could have never insulted a teacher upfront like Neville was doing, and you desperately wish you could. But as child you were taught morals. You don't disrespect authority, at least not to their face anyway. Why else did you pretend to listen to Umbridge's speech at the start of fifth year? You haven't changed much. Not really.

You've gone on the expeditions of the castle, been with the people who wrote 'Dumbledore's Army, still recruiting' on the walls. But you were always the lookout, never the criminal. It wasn't that you didn't believe in it; you just didn't want to get caught doing the task. You did, however, on several occasions and it didn't bother you _too_ much. You're a man of principals after all and you weren't going to lie down and take orders from the Carrows, or let someone else take the blame. You just would rather that no one knew you were behind it.

You call yourself a coward, because you know that's what you are.

You can't help but shake with fear when the Carrows tell you that you're getting the Cruciatus curse. You don't stand strong like Neville next to you. You tremble with terror because you're scared out of your wits.

The pain of the Cruciatus curse is unbearable, you scream in agony, tears falling down your cheeks as what feels like a thousand knifes puncture your skin. You want nothing more than to die right there. Except when it stops. Then you know you have to keep fighting , but not leading anything, you'll just dutifully follow (something you're not usually used to doing, you're a prefect after all, you are meant to lead), like any Hufflepuff does.

One day, maybe, you'll have the courage to lead something. Maybe you'll have strength to say something to the Carrows. Maybe you'll have the bravery to do something heroic.

But for now, you'll sit in the background. Helping and aiding the cause, but quietly.

At the moment you envy them.

You long to have the open bravery they have because your quiet almost-courage isn't like that.

No. Not at all.

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Everyone is rushed to the hall, all the students from all the houses. Everyone sits nervously at their house tables; you sit with Justin, Hannah and Susan at the Hufflepuff one, looking around at all the faces.

There are some people in dressing gowns, others in travelling cloaks; the same look of terror is on almost every one of the students' faces. With this many students in the hall, you'd have thought that everyone would be talking loudly, but that isn't the case tonight. It's like you've entered sacred territory, the only sounds are the wind outside and the low hum of whispers as each petrified friend murmurs something to another.

"What do you think is going to happen?" Hannah whispers in your ear.

"I don't know. But I'm staying and fighting, no matter what." You say defiantly. You're not going to run away from the battle, you're going to stand straight backed and fight until you can't fight anymore. Students _do_ look to the prefects in this type of situation after all, and you want to set a good example. You always have, you remind yourself.

Suddenly, McGonagall is up at the front of the hall, every frightened face has his or her eyes on the Transfiguration professor.

"...evacuation will be overseen by Mr Filch and Madam Pomfrey. Prefects, when I give the word, you will organise your House and take your charges, in an orderly fashion, to the evacuation point."

The students around you are looking more frightened than ever but there are a few that look disappointed that they can't stay and help protect Hogwarts. No one else looks like they're going to say anything so you stand up, Susan gives you a questioning look and Justin looks impressed but you just say what you need to say.

In the strongest voice you can muster, you shout "And what if we want to stay and fight?"

You sit down and there is a small amount of applause and you can't help but feel proud of yourself for saying something like that in a hall full of people; teachers, students, ghosts and Order of the Phoenix members, you are a bit pompous after all. Even if you don't like admitting it to yourself.

"If you are of age, you may stay." Professor McGonagall says.

"That was really brave. I'd never have the courage to do that, you're like a Gryffindor in Hufflepuff robes." Hannah whispers from the seat beside you.

"It had to be said." You say and turn your head and listen to what orders McGonagall is giving now.

Even so, you can't help that feel that maybe, just maybe, you acted like a Gryffindor.

It was your turn to lead, and you lead.

Maybe you're not so different to the group of your courageous classmates after all.

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Author's note: Go on, how many of you guessed it was Ernie? If you did, then I'm proud. I certainly wouldn't have if I wasn't writing this. I'm not completely sure about this chapter. I don't like it as much as my Regulus chapter and I find Ernie a hard character to write. I know it's just less than half the size of my last one, but Ernie isn't as complex as Regulus and he was much closer to becoming a Gryffindor than the youngest Black. That's why I love him; he's just so pompous it's funny.

**I'd also like to say I've gotten a lot of inspiration for Ernie from the story 'A Hufflepuff, Always' by Squid7000. It is one of my favourite stories on fanfiction and I recommend anyone to read it, it truly is amazing. **

**Thanks for all your lovely reviews; I'm really glad you seem to be enjoying the story. If there is something you don't like, tell me for Merlin's sake! I want to know what I'm doing wrong so I can get better. But thank you very much for all reviews.**

**I'm hoping to get the next chapter up soon. I'm almost half way done so that should be good. In the next day or two you should expect it. I'm just finding inspiration for this story easily which makes it quicker to write which means I'm much quicker to update than on my others stories.**

**TTFN**

**Dork-with-glasses**

**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**


	4. To Envy a Cousin

**I do realise the age of which these characters are could be a bit screwed up (since I don't think that Sirius went to school with Andromeda) but it wouldn't work any other way so I really hope you can forgive me (because usually I really hate writing non-canon things). **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

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**Andromeda Black**

You envied him. You really did.

He escaped this family, your family. He was only eleven but he'd already managed to stand up and take a stand. You were seventeen, turning eighteen in a month. You'd had a long time, eighteen _years_, to tell your family about what you _truly _thought of them. Your cousin took eleven. You had had seven more years than him and _still_ hadn't done it.

When the brim of the sorting hat opened over the top of your cousin's, Sirius Black's, head and shouted "GRYFFINDOR" in front of the entire hall, all you wanted to do was waltz over and join him. Or better yet, over to the Hufflepuff table where Ted Tonks sat with his group of friends. But you didn't. You stayed put, heard your sister, Narcissa, mutter something like "Aunt Walburga is _not_ going to be happy about that" and your heart sunk. You knew that your Aunt had a horrible temper, that she was prone to overreacting. Sirius was in for a rough time when he next saw his mother, and it was just because of the House he was sorted into. The prejudice in your family amazed you sometimes. It doesn't matter that Sirius is a Gryffindor. He shouldn't be treated any differently. In any other family, that might be the case, but you've known your family long enough to know that they'll never accept your cousin now.

Imagine, you think, if they found out about Ted. Oh you'd be history, that's for sure. Bellatrix would have a fit, torture you into insanity and kill you, along with 'that mudblood'. Narcissa would shake her head in a disappointed way, probably never speak to you again (if Bella didn't kill you first), your mother and father would be _ashamed _and throw you out of the house and Aunt Walburga would blast you off the family tree.

Lovely. Just lovely.

You see why you were sorted into Slytherin. Not an ounce of courage. None whatsoever.

You wish you had some though; just enough to tell your sisters that you were dating a muggleborn. You were head over heels in love with the man for Merlin's sake! But you wouldn't. You _couldn't. _And you know you wouldn't, you were a coward after all. You probably wouldn't breathe a word of it until Narcissa walked in on you snogging him and were forced to admit the truth. Because, again, you're no Gryffindor. You don't have the guts to stand up to your family of pureblood supremacists, to tell them they're wrong and that you don't care that the guy you love has muggle parents. Maybe if you were Sirius, you'd tell them.

You can easily imagine Sirius in the same situation as you, six years on, if he hasn't run away from home first. You can see him walking purposely into the kitchen at Grimmauld Place, staring his mother right in the eyes and saying "I'm in love with a muggleborn and I don't care what you think". Or something along those lines. Probably with more swearing and curses than anyone thought a sentence like that could ever hold. But hey, that's just your cousin.

You'd faint before you said that to your mother and you'd contemplate committing suicide before saying it to Bella. She'd kill you anyway; you might as well take the secret to the grave.

You really aren't a Gryffindor at all; you're too scared to tell your own sister who you're dating.

Mind you, if anyone had met your older sister, they'd understand what you're talking a about.

Merlin, you desperately wanted to be as brave as Sirius, as the rest of those Gryffindors, just to make your life that much better. You knew that telling them was the _right_ thing to do. But when, you snort, do Slytherins ever to the 'right' thing? Your House has been taking the easy way out for centuries.

Maybe one day you'll have the bravery to tell you family about your relationship, about your views on their values. But for now, you'll just fade back into the background and hope nobody asks about your love life.

Your eyes flick to Ted at the Hufflepuff table, he's laughing at something his friend said. Suddenly, he looks over to you and winks.

Yes, you tell yourself, maybe one day you'll tell them. But you're not brave enough at the moment.

And a small part of you doubts you ever will be.

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"YOU FILTHY LITTLE BLOOD TRAITOR! YOU DISGRACE TO THE BLACK FAMILY NAME!" Your sister yells at you. Her spit flying through the air and onto your face. Nevertheless, you stand strong and meet Bella's eyes. You've wanted to tell them for a long time, and the time is finally right.

It's a Black Family occasion; both of your sisters were there, along with Narcissa's darling _pureblood_ boyfriend Lucius Malfoy, your mother and father, Aunt Walburga, Uncle Orion and finally, Regulus and Sirius (who you suspected had been dragged here against his will).

It's the summer after your seventh year at Hogwarts and you were sitting there at the dining table, listening to most of your family talk about 'mudbloods' and how they shouldn't be allowed to go to Hogwarts. When the family gets on to blood traitors, like the Potters, you have to grab Sirius's arm next to you to stop him doing anything he'd regret. He's more than ready to jump to his friend's defence, but you don't want him grounded for the holidays.

"If you say anything, they won't let you go to James's later in the holidays." You murmured to him. He scowled but nodded curtly.

However, it was when they got onto people you knew, muggleborns that you knew that you snapped, and it was Sirius's turn to grab you by the wrist.

"And as for people like that Tonks, the one in your year Andromeda, he was always tripping over things, couldn't stand on his own two feet. That mudblood shouldn't be allowed in muggle society, let alone Hogwarts." Bellatrix said. And that's what made you stand up.

"Andromeda, are you sure this is the right time to tell them?" Sirius muttered. You moved your head down slightly so no one but Sirius would recognise it as a nod. You don't know how he knows but you're not sure you want to find out. It's better just to not know things in some situations.

Every person at the table stared at you.

"Don't call him a mudblood." You said, glaring at Bellatrix. "Ted Tonks can stand on his own two feet; he doesn't belong in muggle society because he _belongs_ at Hogwarts. He's just as much of a wizard as the rest of us are. Hell, probably more so because this bloody family can't get past its pureblood beliefs. Muggleborns are just as much of wizards and witches as we are."

You don't think anyone quite knows what you're saying. Well, it's obviously a new concept to them, equality.

"What are you talking about, Andromeda? Surely you don't know that mudblood." Bella said, as though daring you to say otherwise in front of her.

"Of course I know Ted Tonks. I've been going out with him for more than a year." You snapped at your sister, not caring that she knows.

And that's when all hell broke loose. Your mother started crying in shame, your father comforted her, glaring at you, Narcissa shook her head in a disappointed way (just like you expected, you think sadly), Lucius just looked bewildered, your Uncle Orion didn't look at you but he certainly looked pissed off, Aunt Walburga glared daggers at you, Regulus just sat and ate some more food, trying to remain invisible (Merlin you wished you could do that), Sirius gave you the thumbs up, and smiled like an idiot. You didn't want to look at Bella but you did any way.

The look upon her face was livid, her wand held out in front of her, aiming at you. "YOU FILTHY LITTLE BLOOD TRAITOR! YOU DISGRACE TO THE BLACK FAMILY NAME! IMAGINE THE SHAME YOU HAVE BROUGHT ONTO THIS FAMILY! YOU'RE GOING OUT WITH A MUDBLOOD, ANDROMEDA! HAVE YOU NO COMMON SENSE?"

"OF COURSE I HAVE COMMON SENSE!" You yell back, you're not going to take this lying down. Oh Merlin no! "COMMON SENSE TO KNOW THAT THIS FAMILY AND ITS PUREBLOOD SUPREMACY BELIEFS ARE RIDICULOUS."

At that, Sirius gave a whoop of approval and you really wish he'd just shut up.

"I'VE LIVED WITH THIS BLOODY FAMILY FOR EIGHTEEN YEARS AND NEVER SAID A THING BUT NOW I HAVE TO. DON'T YOU _DARE_ INSULT MY BOYFRIEND LIKE THAT AGAIN, BELLA; YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM FOR MERLIN'S SAKE! HE'S SWEET, FUNNY AND HE LOVES ME AND I LOVE HIM AND THERE IS _NOTHING_ YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT."

Your voice is hoarse from all the yelling, you don't think you've ever yelled so much in your life.

Your sister looks like she's been slapped in the face and you don't care one bit. Your mother is still crying in disgrace and you don't care about that either. When has anyone in your family ever showed any love for you?

"Get out." Your head whips around to see your father, his arm still around your mother but staring at you like he's never seen you before. Well, you laugh in your head humourlessly, he obviously never has. Not truly anyway. "Didn't you hear me? Get out of this house. You filthy blood traitor. Never come back and don't make any contact with this family again. You're a disgrace."

You just stand there.

"GET OUT!" He roars and points to the door.

"That's the nicest thing you've ever done for me, Dad. I'll gladly leave." You say and walk straight out of the room (a cry of "And what was the whoop for Sirius Orion Black? Consider yourself punished when you get home." could be heard). You summon your things from your bedroom (you always were good with household spells) and they all come down, neat and packed in your trunk and other bags.

You slam the door on the way out and march down the garden path.

As you make it to the street outside, you turn quickly turn on the spot and disapparate.

The house you appear at is of average size, with white walls and a grey roof. Two stories high and there is a deck outside the front door. You open the creaky gate (how fitting, you almost smile to yourself) and make your way up the path, passing fruit trees until you get to the front door.

With your hand shaking slightly, you are able to knock on the door a few times. As you wait for someone to answer the door, your thoughts go back to what was said in the dining room, you scrunch your eyes up in an effort to make sure the tears don't fall.

"Dromeda, I wasn't expecting you! What are you doing here? Is everything..." he trails off as he takes in your appearance. Your tear filled eyes, hopeless expression and the belongings standing beside you.

Ted Tonks pulls you into a hug and you burst into tears. He just stays there with you, rubbing you back as tears fall thick and fast from your eyes.

"Come inside." He says to you after awhile in a calm, soft voice. "It's not going to do any good standing out here."

And with that he walks you into the house and shows you the couch while he gets your bags. The Tonks' home is lovely, you think, cream coloured walls and light coloured furniture; it's a complete contrast to your dark house. Even more so when you see all the muggle things around, the non moving pictures, the various bits and bobs that you have no idea what they are, or what they do. It doesn't bother you in the slightest, you find it fascinating, and refreshing to be somewhere so different from what you're used to.

Ted comes in with two cups of tea but predictably he trips over and the cups fall to the ground and spill the hot liquid everywhere.

"Damn it." He mutters to himself as he quickly cleans it all up with a simply 'scourgify' and 'reparo'. "I'll be back." He smiles at you and you manage a weak smile in return.

This time, he doesn't drop the tea and looks very relieved when he hands you yours without spilling it.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" he asks you. "Because it's ok if you don't."

"No, it's ok." You say and you tell him everything.

Everything from your family's beliefs (which he already knows but you feel the need to say it again), to their behaviour, and when it comes to their conversation that evening you burst into tears again. Ted hurriedly puts down his cup, knocking a book off the table in the process, and pulls you into his arms again.

"Shhh, it's okay." He says soothingly. "It's going to be fine. Whatever they said about you, they didn't mean it."

"It wasn't about me." You sobbed into his chest. "It was stuff they were saying about _you_."

"Well that's even better." You could hear the smile in his voice. "They don't hate you Dromeda, they hate me and that's perfectly fine with me."

"No, they hate me too." You say. "They kicked me out of the house, Ted. They never want to see me again."

"Why'd they kick you out, love? That doesn't seem very fair." He says in that same soothing voice as he rubbed your back in an effort to calm you down. It works, sort of.

"Because I stood up for you, because I said I'd had enough of their stupid beliefs and that muggleborn witches and wizards were equal, if not better than them." You tell him.

He let out a deep chuckle. "You're the most un-Slytherin Slytherin I've ever met, love." He tells you. "Are you sure you're not a Gryffindor?"

You look up at him and he's smiling at you, you smile weakly back. Ted's felt more like family than your family ever was. More caring, sweet and he loves you more than they ever did. Maybe this was for the better, this Gryffindor-like act saved you from the hell that was your family and brought you here. To Ted.

You think of the things you told your family and how you told them that muggleborns were just like purebloods. You can see Sirius doing that, that's for sure.

Maybe you're closer to your Gryffindor cousin than the rest of your coldblooded Slytherin family anyway.

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**Author's note: You know how I said none of these would be as long as my Regulus chapter? Well, I lied. I didn't mean to, this one just turned out longer than I expected and is about one hundred words more than Regulus's. **

**I hope you thought my portrayal of Andromeda was realistic, she's never really mentioned in the books so I did find it a bit hard to understand her character but I think I worked it out ok. Your opinions in a review would be lovely.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, you're all incredible so thanks heaps!**

**Next chapter should be out in a day or two, I'm only a tiny bit of the way through with this one. **

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**Dork-with-glasses**

**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**


	5. To Envy an Enemy

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

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Severus Snape

James Potter.

You could spit the name a thousand ways and it still wouldn't show the disgust you feel for this boy. He's worse than a badly concocted Draught of the Living Dead, worse than lacewing flies that have dried up and are unusable, worse than your hateful muggle father.

But you envy him. You really do. More than almost_ anything_ else in the world.

Oh you hate him, with every fibre of your being, but you can't help but feel envious of his popularity, his talent (although you would never admit that to anyone), his family and his friends. But most of all, you're envious of his _girl_.

Well you don't know if 'his' is the proper pronoun. Merlin, you've known Lily longer than _he_ has and you know she'd never want to be called that, as if she were a possession. Nevertheless, for the sake of argument, she was his.

Maybe she always was, and your insides squirm at the thought of it, but maybe she became his over time. It doesn't matter though. Here, and now, in the final term of your seventh year, for intents and purposes, Lily Evans is James Potter's. You could murder him if you got the chance. He's nothing more than an arrogant, bigheaded, bullying jerk. He doesn't deserve someone as charming, witty, smart and wonderful as Lily Evans. It wouldn't be fair.

But when, you laugh bitterly, has life ever been fair?

If only you had convinced the sorting hat to but you in Gryffindor with her, things might have been different. You would still be friends, maybe even more than that. You blame it on your House, because if you were a Gryffindor, Lily Evans might still be speaking to you. If you were James Potter, Lily Evans would still be speaking to you.

And that's why you envy him the most.

To have Lily to talk to you, laugh with you, or even _look_ at you would be better than what you've had to endure for the past two years. She hasn't looked at you once since that dreaded day, the day where you lost her friendship because of a single word.

If you were a Gryffindor, this wouldn't be a problem. You could still be friends with her, laugh at her jokes, and feel like a burden had lifted. Maybe if you were brave enough when you were eleven (and you think that's probably when you were bravest anyway, you're a coward now and you know it) the sorting hat would have insisted putting you into Gryffindor. And when you were in Gryffindor, Lily would still be your friend.

Yes, it's safe to say that you envy the Gryffindors, especially James Potter, because they have Lily. They can talk to her, look at her without getting hexed, glared at or ignored. James Potter can have a conversation with Lily, and you can't. She hated him first but it doesn't matter because her opinion changed. Your only wish is for her opinion of you to change.

But to do that, well, that would involve courage. Something you don't possess. Not even a little bit. You'd have to have courage to tell the other Slytherins that you don't want to be a Death Eater any more (as surely this is the only way Lily would ever want you) and you'd have to have courage to tell Lily that you still wanted to be her friend. That you loved her.

But you're no Gryffindor. You _don't_ have that bravery. You won't _ever_ have that bravery.

Not really.

* * *

It's Christmas, the Yule Ball in fact, and you don't feel any braver than you did all those years ago when you wanted to tell Lily Evans that you loved her. But still, you don't quite think you're a coward anymore. But of course, that doesn't mean you're brave. Nevertheless, the Mark on your left arm (a constant reminder of what you chose instead of her) grows clearer and you know he, the Dark Lord, is coming back. How? You don't know (although you do have a few suspicions). Why? To conquer the wizarding world. When? Soon. _Very_ soon.

"Well?" murmurs Dumbledore as the two of you walk through the entrance hall as the last few people from the ball head back to their dormitories.

"Karkaroff's Mark is becoming darker too. He is panicking, he fears retribution; you know how much help he gave the Ministry after the Dark Lord fell." You look sideways at Dumbledore, wondering if he'll say anything. When he doesn't you continue. "Karkaroff intends to flee if the Mark burns."

"Does he?" Dumbledore says softly and the two of you watch as the Delacour girl and Davies from Ravenclaw run in from the grounds. "And are you tempted to join him?"

"No," you say. Does Dumbledore think you're a coward still? You know there is no running from the Dark Lord, that it would be foolish to bother trying. Your eyes still looking off to where Delacour and Davies are going, wishing you had a carefree school life like they seem to be having and you answer. "I am not such a coward."

"No," Dumbledore agrees with you. "You are a braver man by far than Igor Karkaroff." He nods slowly and you are slightly stunned by the compliment. "You know, I sometimes think we Sort too soon..."

You look stricken after he leaves you to return to the castle. You're doing everything for Lily, not because you are brave, everything to protect her son (and _his_ son, you think bitterly) for her, to keep him safe, for her. That's not bravery, is it? Maybe it is.

You're risking your life to help Lily's son (even though she has been dead for 13 years), maybe that is bravery.

And for once this thought didn't disgust you.

Maybe you're more similar to your chivalrous enemy than you could have guessed.

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Author's note: I hadn't guessed that Snape's would have been the shortest so far but what do you know? It is. I hope you liked it. I wasn't quite sure which moment to use for Snape's 'become a Gryffindor' part because he is

_**so incredibly**_** brave throughout the whole series. But I decided on this moment because a) I love the line "You know, sometimes I think we Sort too soon..." and b) it shows his bravery in a more reflective kind of way, not actions but in conversation which is different to the other three that I've already done and sort of represents Snape. He's been brave through his words more than his actions, his ability to make people believe him. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it. **

**Last person coming up next chapter, I hope you'll enjoy that one and that you enjoyed this one! And the best way to tell me is...in a review! Thanks a million to everyone who reviews, it really makes my day.**

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**Dork-with-glasses**

**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**


	6. To Envy a Friend

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

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Scorpius Malfoy

He was your best friend, but you wanted to be him.

Well not _be_ him per se, you'd die with hair that messy and that many cousins would probably overwhelm you. But the fact that he was free of prejudice made you envy him more than anything.

Despite him being in Gryffindor, and you in Slytherin, you'd made friends with Al Potter on the first day of September on your first journey to Hogwarts. You'd shared a compartment on the Hogwarts express and even with the sorting hat putting you in different houses, you'd remained close. It was a bit of shock for everyone (especially Al's brother James) that the two of you were on speaking terms, let alone friends. Apparently sons of War Heros and sons of Death Eaters aren't supposed to mix.

Well, five years ago, the two of you pretty much broke that rule into pieces.

However, a rule that you haven't been able to break is the fact that everyone expects people to be carbon copies of their parents. It's alright for people like Rose Weasley who is exactly like her mother when it comes to study habits and intelligence, but is far more like her father in personality. She's a cross of them in looks, with busy red hair, brown eyes and freckles, and in personality; it's exactly what people expect.

But then there are people like you.

You're not going to lie, you know you look exactly like your father (apart from the warmth in your eyes, or at least that's what your mum told you), and you don't mind all that much. Let's be honest, there are worse people you could look like. You don't mind that much when it's _just_ the looks. When people expect you to be just like him in personality, it's then that you're not too pleased.

People expect you to be a muggleborn hating, egotistical, bullying prat, just like your dad was when he was at Hogwarts. But you're not. You couldn't care less about people's blood status (you've dated a muggleborn for Merlin's sake), you don't think you're the best thing since self-stirring cauldrons and the only person you've ever jinxed is Rose Weasley (and let's be honest, she starts it half the time). You're a lot different than your dad, you've been at the school for over five years and most people still have a problem grasping that simple concept.

And that's why you envy Albus.

People look at you like you're about to use an Unforgivable Curse on them, or that you're going to start insulting them, or give them a detention because _obviously_ you abuse your power as a prefect and would give someone a detention for just standing in a hallway.

Unlike Al. When people see him they expect him to say hi, ask them a polite question, ask if they're ok if they look upset or do some other bloody nice thing because he is Albus Severus Potter, the Saviour of the Wizarding World's son, so obviously he is the nicest boy to walk the face of the earth.

And it's not that he's not, because he's actually pretty close, it's the fact that people assume it because of who his father is. It bugs you to no end because they automatically assume he's the nice guy (which he is, but again, it's _not the point_) and that you're the bad guy (which you're not, well you don't think you are).

To escape the prejudice you've had to cope with for your whole life would be heaven and you can't do that being a Slytherin. It's the Gryffindors who are free from prejudice. None of them chose the wrong side in the war (well except Pettigrew, but he didn't reproduce) so they're all fine and dandy. For you and a lot of other Slytherins, your whole reputation at Hogwarts is built on prejudice. It sucks to have people hate you because of what your dad did when he was 17.

You wish you had been brave enough for the sorting hat to put you in Gryffindor, just to escape the prejudice you've got because of who your family is. No one would look at you in disgust if you were a Malfoy in Gryffindor, they'd all think you were completely different from your father. But because you look the same, are in the same house, have the same smirk (it's genetics) and aren't on best terms with a Weasley (people seem to conveniently forget you're best friends with a Potter) people don't think twice.

You envy your friend.

Because he had the bravery to be in Gryffindor, and therefore doesn't receive the prejudice which you get because you have a Death Eater father.

You wish you were the same.

You really do.

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People have gotten a bit better, you suppose. It's over a year later and maybe the fact that you're Head boy has shown some people that you're not as evil as they thought you were. After all, you can't really have an evil Head Boy. Well, they haven't had one as far as you're aware. Maybe people are starting to warm up to you. However, there are still some people that flinch at the sight of you when you're in a mood (even though, like any other teenage guy, sometimes you are in a mood and it's perfectly normal).

At the moment, you just happen to be sitting in the library, studying for the upcoming N. E. W. Ts, undoubtedly the most important examinations of your schooling career. And if you want to be a Healer, and you do, then you have to get top marks. Which is to be expected, of course.

Some whispering from around you distracts you from _Advanced Level Transfiguration_. Two third years, from Hufflepuff, are whispering to one another, casting nervous glances in your direction. You hear the phrase _"son of a Death Eater"_ and suddenly you snap.

Maybe it's the stress of the upcoming exams getting to you, or the prospect of finishing school in a few months or maybe it's the fact you've never had the courage to say something about all these whispers for seven years and maybe it's time you did.

"Alright!" You say loudly and slam your book on the small library table in front of you. Every single person in the vicinity stares at you, you can see people peaking their faces around shelves but you really couldn't care less. "I've had enough. It's been almost seven years and I haven't said anything but I'm _not_ exactly like my father. I _don't_ hate muggleborns, want to curse anyone and I certainly don't think that Voldemort had the right ideas about society. I'm sick and tired of people whispering about it and all the prejudice I've had to put up with so I just thought I'd make that clear. I'm not my father, I'm my own person."

Everyone continues to stare and you feel a pink tinge making its way onto your face.

"Thank you, sorry for disturbing your studying." You say and you sit back down and hide behind your book once more.

After several minutes, when you peak over the top of your book, everyone is back to what they were doing before, although some (including the third year Hufflepuffs) glance your way every so often. You absorb yourself in the book's pages once more and block out all the noise around you. However, after about 10 minutes you hear someone plonk into the seat in front of you.

"Hey." A cheery voice says and you look up from your book to see a bush of curly red hair in front of you.

"Hi." You reply.

"I saw what you did before." Rose Weasley tells you.

"What?"

"What you said to everyone, about the prejudice and everything." She rolls her eyes at your slowness.

"Oh." You respond, not really sure what else to say.

"It was really brave." She continues on, as though you sounded very engaged in the conversation (which, obviously, you hadn't). "You should be proud of that."

"Thanks?" You say unsurely, because you're never quite sure when Rose is complimenting you or insulting you.

"You're welcome." She smiles and you take it as a compliment. "See you around, Malfoy."

And with that, she leaves the library.

Brave. Was it really? To stand up at say what was on your mind for seven years? Maybe it was brave. Maybe it did show some courage. Hm, you never really thought you'd possess any qualities (even for a few seconds) from the red and gold coloured house.

Maybe your attributes were nearer to your best friend's than you ever thought possible.

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Author's note: Well that's the last person finished. I hope you enjoyed Scorpius; I really do love him as a character. I was originally going to have him standing up to someone who was making fun of someone else but I prefer this way. It just makes more sense considering why he was envious of Al in the first place.

**Just one more chapter to sum it all up now.**

**Thanks heaps for all the reviews I've been receiving, it really does mean a whole lot.**

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**Dork-with-glasses**

**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**


	7. Epilogue

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter (or the bolded italic text directly below this, it comes from Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, which I don't own). **

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**_You might belong in Gryffindor, _**

**_Where dwell the brave at heart, _**

**_Their daring, nerve, and chivalry _**

**_Set Gryffindors apart._**

You might have been a Slytherin, cunning, ambitious and sly.

You might have been a Hufflepuff, diligent, just and loyal.

You might have been a Ravenclaw, inquisitive, intelligent and wise.

But you weren't a Gryffindor, daring, brave and chivalrous.

You tried; you really did, to be a Gryffindor, to have that daring, nerve and chivalry that set Gryffindors apart. You really truly did. It seemed like the answer to all your problems. That's why you envied them after all.

A cunning snake, a loyal badger or an intelligent eagle but you weren't a courageous lion. Not to begin with anyway.

Maybe it didn't matter in the end. Maybe it was ok to be a coward. Maybe it didn't matter that you weren't brave. But by the point this thought struck, you had already succeeded.

Your final act was courageous; your brother couldn't have done it better.

You bravely stood up in front of a hall full of people and said what was on your mind; your classmates were impressed.

Your nerve helped you rebel against your family and told them the truth; your cousin whooped in pleasure.

You were chivalrous until the very end, fighting for someone long gone; your enemy would have been pleased.

You boldly confronted the students of Hogwarts and told them what you thought; your best friend was mighty proud.

Although you weren't always a Gryffindor. You didn't always show your bravery, chivalry or courage. It didn't matter, your one or more courageous acts would be remembered, because you dared to be different. You dared to be a Gryffindor in a House full of Slytherins, Hufflepuffs or Ravenclaws. You were brave enough to stand up for what was right (in whatever way worked best, silent, spying or upfront). You were a merely Gryffindor in different coloured robes.

In the end, you shouldn't have been envious of your brother, classmate, cousin, enemy or friend. You proved that you were just as capable of a lion-like act as they were.

You envied a Gryffindor.

You really did.

It wasn't such a bad thing. It wasn't.

It wasn't a humiliating fact. It wasn't.

It wasn't something to be ashamed of. It wasn't.

It wasn't a bad thing to want. To envy.

You weren't daring, brave or chivalrous.

Not then anyway.

But you are now.

That's why you don't envy them anymore after all.

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**Author's note: Thank you so much for reading the story. I'm just going to go straight ahead and post this chapter because I feel the need to finish it (even though I only posted the other chapter a little while ago). I really hope you enjoyed the story. **

**Thank you to everyone for the lovely reviews I've been getting. They really mean heaps. If you'd just like to click the review button below for this chapter, I would be forever grateful. As I've said before, I really want to know what people think, it helps me improve. **

**Thanks again so much, for reading, alerting, favouriting and reviewing because it means heaps.**

**Final thanks!**

**TTFN**

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